Wrath of the Exocomps
by Rykan
Summary: Based on the Exocomps episode; just a funny alternative. It helps if you've seen the episode recently.


By: Rykan Diclaimer: Star Trek belongs to Gene Roddenberry, and Paramount. No profit made, yada yada yada. Notes: I wrote this a couple of years ago (ah, I was so much younger then ^^ no, i was, i'm 16 now, i wrote it when i was like, 13!) and just found it when I was clearing out my hard drive. It's based on the TNG ep 'Exocomps' (or something to that effect). It would help a lot if you have seen the episode recently...very recently; I'm re-reading it and even I don't get some of it now ^_^; I've edited it a bit, so forgive me if it makes even less sense than it did before.  
  
Star Trek: The Next Generation: Wrath of the Exocomps  
  
"Commander" Worf asked "Is it your intention to continue to grow a beard?" Geordi gave him a sceptical look. "Are you kidding?" He joked. "I think beards mean a man has something to hide." Beverly said, looking around the poker table at all three bearded men. "I think beards show strength in a man." Riker said. "And in Klingon culture, it is honourable to have a beard." Worf added. "And many crew members on the ship have beards." Geordi defended. "Is it wrong of me to want to fit in?". "Lets raise the stakes." Beverly said. "I win, you lot shave your beards off." "And if we win?" asked Riker. "I go brunette" said Beverly. "We have reached the station. All senior officer report to the bridge." Picard's voice chimed over the intercom. All three bearded men rose from the table. "Sorry." Riker grinned. At that, they left Beverly looking very frustrated.  
  
Geordi found the project full of idiotic mistakes. How in gods name was he going to fix all this?! "I have something to show you, Commander." Dr. Farallon told Geordi. "Doctor, please, not now; I'm busy!" She smirked. "Don't flatter yourself, commander. I didn't mean that. There is machine I have developed. Let me show you-" but she was cut off when, suddenly, there was an explosion which knocked everyone about. "What the hell was that!?" Geordi yelled. Dr. Farallon picked up a little machine and shoved it in a Jefferies tube. She then picked up a remote control for her toy. The thing launched off down the tube. A minute later, the red alert status returned to normal. "Data to LaForge, what just happened over there? And how did you fix it so quickly?" "To be honest, Data" Geordi replied "I have no idea, which isn't something new."  
  
Dr Farallon beamed over to the Enterprise. Instantly, she started drooling over Data, telling him how much she's studied him and his posotronic network. She, Data and Geordi walked down to Engineering, with Dr. Farallon still drooling over Data. She then explained how the Exocomps worked, which impressed the two of them, and surprised them; what technology could possibly be more advanced than the Enterprise's technology? They ended up in Picard's office. "You can't give your report into Starfleet yet. I haven't showed off my nifty little Exocomps yet." "I understand one of these stopped the station getting blown to pieces?" "That's right." "Very well, doctor. You may proceed." And with your permission captain, Id like commander Data to work with me." She leaned over to whisper in Picard's ear. "Because I REALLY like Data, you see."  
  
Data and Dr. Farallon were back on the station. "Commander!" Farallon called out "There's a plasma conduit in one of the access tunnels. Time to show off these little baby's!" They walked over to the access tunnel and plonked the Exocomps inside it. They then turned around and started to walk away. The Exocomps flew out of the tunnel, looking miffed (if an Exocomp can look miffed). "What's wrong with it? It hasn't finished its work. You will do what I command!" Dr. Farallon yelled at the Exocomps. "Data looked at the Exocomps. "It doesn't like your commanders, doctor." At this point, the access tunnel exploded; BOOM! ~*~*~*~*~ "There's something wrong with it!" Farallon told Geordi. "We tried to put it back in the tunnel after it came out, and it just.... Overloaded." Geordi smirked. "I told you so." he gloated. "HM!" Farallon walked off. "I do feel sorry for her. This project has been nothing but trouble for her. It wouldn't have been for me. But, I suppose it was a good thing the Exocomps overloaded. Its like it knew just when to leave.... bit like a crash-gater at a party." This got Data thinking. "Are you saying that it is.... Alive?" Data asked. Geordi then had to leave. Picard was worried about the efficiency of the replicators. So as soon as Geordi left, Data picked up the Exocomps and ran off to his quarters. Data then did a full diagnostic on the little bugger. "The Exocomps caused a power surge at 11.50 today" The computer said. "It then repaired it self at 1300 40 hours today."  
  
Worf and Beverly were in sickbay with Beverly sitting on a bio bed, repairing a scar from her 'battle' with the Klingon using Bat'leths. "I nearly kicked your butt!" Beverly gloated. "Yes, inearly/i." Worf said, looking miffed. At that moment Data came in. "Doctor, what is the definition of life?" Beverly jumped off the bio bed and lead Data into her office. "Life is anything that lives, breathes and eats really. Why?" "I want to test a hypothesis" "Oh, okay."  
  
Back on the station, Data jumped off the transporter pad. "I demand that you stop using the Exocomps, doctor!" Data yelled. "But why?" She asked. "Because THEY'RE ALIVE!!!"  
  
Data, Geordi, Picard and Farallon were all gathered round the entrance to a Jefferies Tube. They'd shoved the Exocomps inside the tube. "We have created a simulation similar to the one that happened on the station." Geordi told Picard. "We have created a warp core breach simulation, which is in no way even close to the original scenario on the station." Data said. "We've given it 1 minute to fix the breach and get out to prove it's alive. If it doesn't come out, boom! It would be destroyed if this were real." Geordi explained. "We will start the experiment.... Now." Geordi said. The Exocomps launched off down the tube. Dr. Farallon started to get smug. Geordi counted down "5, 4, 3, 2, 1..." All four of them walked out into main Engineering. "Well, I hope your not too disappointed Data. I know this certainly wasn't a surprise to me-"... and at that moment, the angry Exocomps flew out of the Jefferies Tube straight at Dr. Farallon. It had a Phaser on the front of it. It fired the Phaser at her, knocking her unconscious. "Its alive!" Data yelled. "IT'S ALIVE!!!"  
  
Back on the station, Geordi and Picard and Dr. Farallon were jolted and the red alert status came on. "Captain, there's a radiation surge! We've gotta get out of here!" The Enterprise beamed back all on the station but Geordi, Picard and a dead bloke called Dekenta. Riker, Worf and Dr. Farallon tried to beam the three ready-to-explode Exocomps over to the station, but they couldn't. "I will not let you kill the Exocomps!" Data yelled. "That's why I have locked out transporter control! BWUHAHAHAHAHA!!!" Riker yelled at Data to release the transporter lock out. Data wouldn't. "Hm. Well, why don't we ask them if they want to?" Riker asked Data. "That sounds reasonable sir." Data replied. "If they are willing to go, Ill release the transporter lock out." So Riker and Data went to the transporter room. The three Exocomps were on the transporter pads. "If the Exocomps do not shut down after I program them, we must assume they are willing to go." Data said. The Exocomps talked to each other... and then, they shut down. "Damn!" Riker yelled. "There's nothing more we can do, now." Data said... "And I told you so." 


End file.
